Donald Trump says he loves the Bible, but when asked he couldn’t name a single verse. Twitter users have hilariously come to his rescue using the #TrumpBible hashtag. Here’s my Trumped up Bible offerings.
“Do unto others the way they do you, but a lot harder, especially if it’s that fat loser Rosie O’Donell.”
“It’s easier for a camel to get through the eye of a needle than keep Mexicans out of our country. But I’ll make bigger, wider needles and build higher fences.”
“When Jesus was crucified – like I was by Megyn Kelly, he had blood coming out of his hands and feet and whatever, I prefer alive martyrs myself, but he said some good stuff.”
“The lord is my shepherd, I shall not want, because wanting is for losers. I’m a winner and I get what I want.”
“Come to me all who are weary and I will give you rest….I got a string of very classy hotels, so I know a lot about that.”